Idiot sighting

Sheldon

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Joined
Aug 10, 2008
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1,050
Location
Battle Creek Mi.
Be Careful Out There:

IDIOT SIGHTING:
We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a "large" enough motor
on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, "Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower." I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, "NO, it's not." Four is larger than two.."


We haven't used Sears repair since.



IDIOT SIGHTING

My daughter and I went through the McDonald's
take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter. She said, "you gave me too much money." I said, "Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back." She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said "We're sorry but they could not do that kind of thing." The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in
change. Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.


IDIOT SIGHTING :
I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore."

From Kingman , KS .

IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE:
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.
From Kansas City


IDIOT SIGHTING:

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" To
which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded,

"That' s why we ask."

Happened in Birmingham , Ala.




IDIOT SIGHTING:

The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew
what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing
driving?!"

She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS


IDIOT SIGHTING:
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker. She was leaving the company due to "downsizing." Our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We
should do this more often." Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.

IDIOT SIGHTING :
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.

A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.

IDIOT SIGHTING:
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service
department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door
handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "its open!" His reply, "I know. I already got that side."

This was at the Ford dealership in Canton , Mississippi


STAY ALERT!

They walk among us... and the scary part is that they VOTE and they REPRODUCE!
 

karlbamforth

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Nov 2, 2005
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Langkawi, Malaysia
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Whilst travelling in Asia I had 12 aluminium welding rods in my hand luggage.

I was amazed to be able to do 3 flights with barely a comment.

On the fourth flight security stopped me and told be I couldn't carry them hand luggage and would need to check them in.

With 10 mins to go till boarding I run to far end of airport and check them in at a cost of 10 rm the vast amount of $3.50. Desk staff add a tag and tell me it is too late to load them and I have to hand carry them......

I run back to departure gate where security again stop me. I sarcasticly explain that having paid 10rm and got a nice tag attached they are now safe to be carried in hand luggage. Security guard says have a nice day and lets me through.
 

jcarleto

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Taylorsville, GA
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Several
Oh...whew!

For a moment I thought this thread was a dissertation on my office. Good thing it isn't. There are not enough trees for paper nor bytes of storage on the Internet for all the IDIOT SIGHTING stories that could be generated there.

My personal favorite:

IDIOT SIGHTING: (the names have been withheld to protect the idiot)

A programmer designed a process for marketing. He embarked upon a detailed, step-by-step explanation of operations for the process over the telephone. Twenty minutes into the call, the marketing agent remarked, "Could you start over? There was a fly in here."


The sad thing is that you don't have to make this stuff up. You just have to watch it go by.

*JC*
 

gyroparts

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Bismarck, ND
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A blond friend of mine worked at a local Disc Jockey record store. I stopped in to see her one day and noticed that she was using Ronsinol lighter fluid to remove the sticky residue from the price stickers off of cd jewel cases. I joked that she was going to blow herself up doing that. Her response was,"I'm sure we don't use the flammable kind!"
 

gyroparts

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Messages
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Location
Bismarck, ND
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Gyrobee, T-2 Extra Powered Parachute N476JG. Breezy RLU-1 N477JG
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I also had a 7th grade science teacher tell us that hydrogen was much less boyant than helium. Thats why the german zeppelins had to be so much bigger than the helium filled goodyear blimp.
 

gyroparts

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May 1, 2005
Messages
253
Location
Bismarck, ND
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Gyrobee, T-2 Extra Powered Parachute N476JG. Breezy RLU-1 N477JG
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800
One of my favorite stories from my friend John and his ex wife Melanie happened 15 or 20 years ago around Christmas.

They were in a shopping mall and had split up to get some gifts. Melanie stopped in a store and purchased a large KitKat candy bar. She walked out into the mall and sat down on a double sided bench in the middle.

A rather creepy long haired guy was sitting directly behind her. After a minute or two, he reached up between them, took the candy bar, broke off a piece and ate it. Mel turned around and stared at him but thought she would leave it there and see if he did it again. Sure enough, he reached for it again and broke off another piece. She then turned around, cursed at him and walked off.

She met up with John about a while later in a different part of the mall and was telling him the story. As they walked by a hot dog / pretzel stand, there sat the guy eating a hot dog. Mel said, "watch this" walked over, looked at him, grabbed his hot dog and took a big bite out of it and walked off.

They laughed all the way to the car where HER Kit Kat candy bar fell out of her purse as she was pulling the car keys out.

I would love to hear this guys side of the story! Supposedly one of their friends sent this to Readers Digest sometime later and it was published.
 

PW_Plack

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West Valley City, Utah, USA
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In middle school, I once had a substitute earth science teacher tell my class that metal roofs were very efficient, because in the summer they reflect the heat, and in the winter they reflect the cold.
 
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